you want to estimate, the distance that it takes....come on lets rectify, this mad look in my eye...yes lets discover

winter is officially here.

it's 26*F outside, with three days of the same temperatures in the forecast.

better yet? it's expected to snow fairly non-stop for the next three days! YAY!!!! i love snow!! as long as i don't have to drive in it with the butt fucking retarded population of cleveland who can't even drive on a sunny summer day, let alone one involving rain, snow, sleet, or, dare i say it, clouds....

and you know what this means?

i get to sleep easier....why?

1. with the onset of winter in such climates as cleveland experiences, it is impossible to not wear a coat when walking outside, unless you seriously get your sweater-on and layer-on. know what that means?!! no more girls running around half naked complaining it's cold in the law-building/ law library.......
.....now they run around half naked with a coat on....and the coat makes all the fucking difference....trust me...

2. i get to laugh at all the fucking idiots who sit and smoke outside the law school between classes and freeze their ass off. i consider this my little silver lining to being one of the few non-smokers, and thus really having no friends within the school itself. who knew smoking was the social-epicenter of law school? i sure as fuck didn't. so while you guys enjoy the perks of a social life in our school, i get to laugh my ass off as you sit there puffing away on your cancer stick when it's -2 outside and fuckin windy. you look so cool! holla!

3. the homeless go away. i don't know where, i don't know how...but i do know why-it's fucking cold out. praise allah! nothing is more refreshing than being able to walk your dog before bed without being barraged for every cent of money you lack. fyi: don't ask students if they have any spare change...because unlike you, mr homeless man, they are in DEBT..that means negative money....negative money plus NO INCOME equals nothing for you.

4. my dog gets right on down to mother fuckin business. not that i don't enjoy romping around downtown cleveland at 3am....cause, in all honesty, i don't (i mention that homicide is on the rise in the downtown area here?)...but there's something inherently refreshing in taking your dog out and having her do her business. and not sniff every goddamn bush, tree, shrub, flower, plant..and fake it until she finds the perfect spot. yes. i said fake it. my dog fakes pissing because she hopes i won't notice, and thus she can continue sniffing. well, that all stops with a drop in the temperature. when it gets below 30 she runs to the grassy knoll, pissess with a vengeance and a quickness..and runs back home. add some snow in the mix? she goes straight on the sidewalk.....and at 3am while i'm drunk...that is FAN-FUCKIN-TASTIC!!

5. i get a nice addition to my monthly allowance....why? because my apartment is made out of cement with 9 foot ceilings....and the only option for heating is electric heat....which means my electric bill is about $350.00 a month. granted that money goes straight to my electric bill..but that extra $400 a month i get, makes me feel a shit-ton better.

6. it becomes acceptable to sit at home, drink, chill out and watch movies....and that...that rocks. for, while i love going out and bar hopping....what is better than spending an entire evening in pj's with countless bottles of wine at your expense?

7. in addition to number 6, it becomes acceptable to stay in bed for countless hours....just because it's warm

8. call me scrooge...or bitch...or whatever...but the onset of winter means that the bastard holiday most amicablly known as christmas is coming, going, and almost..thank god....gone! not that i don't love sales shoved down my throat, and the perposterous idea that love, like, cherishment, and friendship can be quantified by material crap abounding on every corner......but..well....yea..no! 24 days to go 'til the bastard holidays are over! yeeeeee-haw!

9. one word: SNOWBOARDING!!!

10. i have no real 10..but i like to end things on even numbers....

have a great weekend y'all :)