weekend update!

so this past weekend i went home....home to the cleavage. it was glorious!! even more glorious was sleeping in my satin sheets once again---god i miss them! was a good weekend, and i'll keep why a secret--unless you ask me, of course--but either way, here are some pictures from my little saturday night partay. enjoy biatches

i left on friday night. go figure the night i'm supposed to leave is the night that albany experiences intermittent thunderstorms, which, coincidently, started at 4pm.....and my flight was at 6pm. GRR! so after a very awesome 40 minute delay and an everything bagel, they loaded up plane....and sent us on our merry way. we made it all of about four feet before another thunderstorm found it's cute little way into the mix, and thus we sat there for 20 minutes. whatever, we took off..i don't care. but i do have one phenomenal question: why does it seem like everyones IQ drops a good 40 points when they enter an airport? i mean people go absolutely retarded the minute they walk in--myself included. AND! what the shit is with the e-ticket machine not spitting out my fuckin ticket if i get there after the hour-before-flight marker point? i mean seriously....what the shit?

so like i said, i got there--1.5 hours late--but i got there, and that's all that matters. so, i arrive, i find my way from the fuckin D wing of the cleveland internetional airport to the rest of the world--which is a good 5 miles, i swear to god! (total side note...ever wonder why they don't just make the moving walkway go the entire length? wouldn't that elimiate precious retarded time...because everyone looks like a tard when they go from super warp speed to normal human speed for the two feet between exiting and entering the moving walkway....) and i get into my taxi with some arab guy who is asking questions and looking at me like he wants to rape me...thank god for cell phones! sorry if i called you for random amounts of sporadic-freaking-out time! finally, after 20 minutes of being eyed through a rear view mirror and being asked random question...i got to my apartment and basically ran in after i paid. HOME SWEET MOTHER FUCKIN HOME! for five minutes at least..then GG came to pick me up and away i went back to his place for some relaxin on el patio-o. next morning, GG took me back to my place shower and low and behold who was waiting for me in my bathroom? the biggest fucking cockroach i....have.....ever.....seeeeeen! jesus christ!! this thing was a good 5 inches long and had fucking wings...and when it's antennae moved around it looked like it was signaling control tower for landing. YUUCH!!! so i run out screaming, and being the manly man that GG is he walked on in, and then went flying out a few seconds later. bitch thought i was freaking out over some tiny bug. uhh no! tiny bug drowns and goes down the drain. big bug, i go use guest shower. so manly man took my can of raid (mexican raid actually...which worked, unlike the time the Dude and i had to basically use an entire can on a cockroach that was in our shower, close the door and wait 5 hours for it to marinate and die)...and mr. roach was dead. fyi: he's still in my shower.

fast forward to saturday night, which was when a few friends of mine decided to throw a party....and invited everyone they knew. which they weren't kidding about, by the end of the night there was a shitload of people on my friends patio. i felt so lurv-ed, even though only about 10 people even knew who i was. so yea, the pictures showcased are from friday night. was a blast of a time, and for those who haven't tried the jolly-tini at fusion--TRY IT! it's delish!

so anyway..i realize you don't give as hit about my weekend..soooo...fuck eeet! enjoy the pictures, and the explanations/who-be-is-who below! =0)

1. robbie flicking off the camera. wow-huh?

2. the crowd on my friends deck after we left fusion

3. denise, donnie, me, gregg, teresa, and tim--AWW!

4. mike, tie, and tie's insanely hot girlfriend. tie came all the way from florida for the 4th weekend, which is good cause not only is he extremely hot, he's a giant teddy bear too. so yea, seen pics of his new girlfriend, but HOLY SHIT! way hotter in person. way way way way WAY hotter. damn her!

5. lurking in the darkness of fusion areeeeeeee...me and teresa flickin you bitches off. this is about when the "my dick feels like corn" thing started. oh yea. that was the phrase of the week. just look at someone and matter-o-factly state: "my dick feels like corn...now give me the butter, give me the butter baby!"--yea don't ask!

6. donnie trying to lick me, and the gregg.

7. so donnie and i have this thing, and i guess denise-his wife-is in on it too. whenever they see me, mostly when donnie sees me, he runs up to me and gets all ready and looks as if he is going to dive in my titt-ay's. and that is all. dive on in baby! the water be is goooooooood!

8. uhhhh denise is pimpin it! with her hubby, of course. uhh so yea, denise, donnie, tim, gregg, and robbie

9. chard, me and gregg----doing the "right there"...which comes directly after the "give me the butter baby" of the "my dick feels like corn" shpeel. once again, don't ask. for those who keep track at home mr. chard got fuckin wasted...so after i drove his car home with him in it, he spewed ALL over gregg's backyard

PS: sorry about the formatting--the damn page wouldn't upload the pics to begin with and instead of having a coronary trying to figure out how to reformat the entire fucking thing for aesthetic niceness--FUCK IT! and deal. oh..and yea, there's about 50 more pics..but i'll spare you the reallllly drunken ones.