this one goes out to all my soldiers that been flippin them birds..to all my shorties wigglin and shakin them curves...

dear middle age men:
yes...you, the guys who are over the age of 34 and still think you can get 23 year old poon..i'm talking to you. honestly? stop. really. it's embarassing...not just for you, but for we girls as well. no girl my age is going to want some guy over 10 years their senoir unless that guy is: a-extremely hot, b-extremely rich, or c-the girl is extremely ugly and no one else will bone her. either way....the odds of you falling into either option (a) or (b) are slim to none...so, i implore you....stop. you have no game, you have more hair on your back then your head, and just because you settled down at the tender age of 35 or onward and are now ready for that proverbial leap into marital bliss, does not mean you have a shot. stop wasting your time. it's sickening that you want to chase the tail of some girl that wasn't even potentially born or cognizant of being alive at the time you entered high school. it's flattering you think we're attractive, now put your tongue back in your mouth and get back to women who are a little closer to your age.

dear idiot people who lounge in the grassy knoll directly outside my law school:
you're dumb. half of downtown takes their dog to this lovely grassy knoll for strategic excrement purposes, and here you sit....with your subway sanwich, pants right on the grass. exchanging in banal law school laughter about the stupidest shit known to man...gross. stand up, go to the picnic tables located a whopping 10 feet away..and sit your ass somewhere other than where my dog drops hers.

dear fellow law students:
give it up. you aren't cool. seriously. the main difference between med students and law students is that law students cling on to this vain hope of being something in the social realm, where as med students just give it up with a flutter of their eyelashes and the sealing of their application. sitting around a bar, smoking, talking about the senate hearings of roberts... is not hip. sitting around outside in the urine infested grassy knoll disussing how the outcome of the latest case you read for class shocked you..is not with it. face it. you are a hop, skip, jump, and a bar exam away from a life of incessant learning, incessant researching, incessant lying and cheating, incessant shitty jokes being told about you, and a life full of suit wearing. yup. the cool kids went to business school. you're a geek. accept, and move on.

dear sheets;
what the fuck do you do at night when i'm sleeping?!! there is no wayi hell i somehow managed to wake up in the same position i fell asleep in (curled up on my side), yet the sheet is on the floor, the blanket is now sideways, and one pillow is now on my head. somehow, my stuffed animal always seems to stay in my right hand. go figure . anyway! just curious! get back to me!

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in random other news......i, ms. designer-name-brand-only, have falle in love with dove shampoo and conditioner. my hair is softer than it's ever been....and for those of you who have had the pleasure of touching my shitty locks, you know i have really soft hair to begin with...so yea! i'm impressed.

tomorrow night is the lakewood bar crawl hosted by the awesome trey....should be interesting to say the least...either i'll have so much fun it'll be awesome, or i'll be so annoyed with half the people who show up and drink myself into puking, dancing on bars, stripping, and find myself on an alltogether new level of obnoxiousness (y'all remember d'vine heh). FUN!

y'all have a goodweekend :)