i see you in line dragging your feet.....you have my sympathy....the day you were born you were born free...that is your privilege..

i've been thinking a lot lately.....

mostly about marriage. now hear me out....i'm not pining for my own...fuck that...but, have you ever looked at someone who is married and thought to yourself "i really wonder who married you." i don't mean this in a mean way....okay...FINE, i kind of do, but c'mon! law school isn't known for their gorgeous people, and aside from like two girls and about one singular guy, there are no attractive people within the four walls of my educational asylum and prison.....yet, everyone is seemingly married or engaged. so it kind of begs the question of "ewwww, who would marry you?" at times....

more often than not.....

......

okay! i get really bored in class and find myself pondering that question a fucking lot. but what can you expect from someone who's left ring finger is first looked at, then my boobs (if it's a guy), then my face with every single person i meet and talk to in school.

anyway.....that was spurned on by the gremlin looking chick in front of me who just got married this past weekend....and i'm just *dying* to see who married her. what? like you don't wonder who walks down the aisle for the ugly people?

_________________

in other news, i get the opportunity to play giant hypocrite to my little cousin, who i hardly talk to as is. it seems that she was blessed with the same fun problem i had in my early teens: scoliosis. not the worst thing in the world...and aside from my back absolutely killing me randomly(which i think has more to do with the shitty car accident i was in than the fact my spine enjoys the letter "s"), i hardly notice it at all. i did, however, notice it when i was 11 and was forced to wear a back-brace to make sure my degree of fuck-ed up-ed ness didn't get worse and i wouldn't require surgery in the future to correct it. whereas i had to wear the fucking thing 24/7 for a year and a half of my life, my wee cousin only has to wear it at night.....and, being true to my family's form...she ain't havin it. in other words, she's making my poor uncles life a living hell so that she doesn't have to wear a plastic thing to bed....which, i can vouch for, isn't that bad to sleep in.....go to school in? horrible....sleep in? who the fuck cares, you're asleep. i do, however, understand where wee cousin is coming from...because when i was 11 and was faced with the prospect of wearing that thing for more than 10 minutes, i flipped out on my parents. i mean, i was a trouble maker and a "bad kid" to begin with, but you add a plastic form fitting mold in the mix..and i was fuckin horrible to my parents...i mean everything was a fight...and, accordingly, i understand were mini-me is coming from. it's embarassing at the very shitty age of 12 to be different, even if it's at night when you're asleep, is the antichrist...because the goal of all hormone-exchanging pre-teens and teenagers is to just fit in...in the most different and unique way possible...of course. in any event, my mother has charged me with the duty of calling her and talking to her about it. i understand i'm the voice of reason seeing as i lived through it, and was abso-fuckin-lutely thrilled when my doctor told me i only had to wear the fucking thing at night....but i also know that when i was her age, i didn't give a fuck what anyone said to me...no one understood what i was going through, how i felt, or how i was affected (and i can vouch for said experience affecting me in the long term...)..... so....i think i'm going to leave it alone. some battles are worth it, and some are an inevitable failure....and i think this one, based on my own experience and being a pre-teen before, is an inevitable failure. good luck uncle mark..may the force be with you.